Tuesday 11 June 2013

Men's Addiction to Sex is the Woman's Power

To all men out there in the civilised world!

I'd never talk to any of you about sex, and neither would you I bet. Men don't! Men talk about chicks and how virile they are. But we all know we lost the power. Ok, I won't say all, there are exceptions, and maybe you are one, BUT in most houselholds in the western world, who makes the decisions? He or She? What to eat, drink, how to decorate the walls, what needs cleaning, when, who to visit, and how to bring up the kids. Men, what are we in charge of? Going to work and earning money, and that is not a given any more. Relationships, today have changed in a fundamental way from just a generation ago and nobody is talking about it.
So, why do women have so much power today? I know this will sound very controversial, but men have the genetic disadvantage of needing to have sex. That's how nature has programmed the male of the species, to do it as often as possible. Women, on the other hand, do not need sex. Sure they might want sex too, but, to them, if the opportunity doesn't arise, no big deal. Many men tend to masturbate to satisfy their need. But that solution is very short-lived and usually only serves to increase the need for more, fuelled by the fantasies that go with it. It is an itch men have to scratch, and every time you scratch it, it gets worse. Put that into a relationship and you get big mood swings from a man who is getting desperate and a wife, who can't understand why he is so obsessed with sex. And misdemeanor by him is punished by denying him the pleasure for a while. So the scene is set for a lady to take the reigns.
As men, what can we do? Go on the internet and fuel the booming porn scene with all the fetishes catered for by actresses, who make you believe there are horny women out there, who are just waiting for your dick. Why do we kid ourselves so easily! Get sex elsewhere, and you'll find a similar situation soon. In a culture where the man has the right to have his needs met by his wife, that whole problem doesn't exist. Now we have a genetic disadvantage and women are outsmarting us day by day, while we think with our dick, they use their brains!
How can a man even contemplate to 'give up' his addiction to his little muscle spasm. After all, that's what an orgasm is, with the release of a few hormones in the brain to make you feel good. Speaking for myself, I get bored very quickly with everything I do. I start, I learn, I try a few variants until I get an idea of the scope of the subject, but sooner or later I loose interest. Why do I never get bored of an orgasm? What do I loose if I don't have another orgasm for the rest of my life? Why does that seem so farfetched? Guys, if men don't get their act together women will have us for breakfast, especially the generation to come.
And may I add, for a man to give up orgasms leads to a more mature person. Mahatma Ghandi, for example, chose to be chaste or he could not have acted the way he did. I am sure that the celebacy of the priesthood had a similar intent, but the abuse that churches have to own up to today shows just how powerful and dangerous man's need for sex is. I can imagine that it can drive a man crazy to be denied sexual release. This need is so deeply embedded in our psyche. But that is no excuse not to start working on it, and the first step is to recognise our sexual need as an addiction, then we can start talking about how to address the worst of it.
One major problem is the perceived social status implication of having sex, whether in the pub or the boardroom, that counts. The 'jokes' help to reinforce that you are only a man if you get sex and often. Try to get away from the severly addicted, I'd say.... But seriously, as a man I feel bad if I don't get. I feel inadequate, robbed of pleasure, maybe even so far as feeling robbed of a reason to live. But look at that as withdrawal symptoms that don't last. Nobody else has actually taken any notice and your live still rolls on as normal.

Thursday 25 August 2011

A new Beginning


Painted after my separation from my wife of 20years. A feeling of freedom, a new phase of life beginning.
Feb 2009. Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm

Tuesday 2 August 2011

Vibrations


The ups and downs of each of our lifes reverberate through time and space.
June 2009. Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm

Tuesday 5 July 2011

Sunday 3 July 2011

Refugee

Aug 2009, Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm
As long as you know what is 'right', you will have no peace. What does that have to do with a Refugee? You work it out...

Tuesday 28 June 2011

A treacherous part of the river

Aug 2010, Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm

I painted this in August 2010 and it is actually a bit darker than the picture suggests. This was a month before the company I worked for went bankrupt and I was left unemployed. I think our path is written and re-written as a continuous consequence of our actions and somehow I was aware of what was to come. As I think everyone is. Starting to re-write ones future may not yield changes for many years as our past actions still reverberate in the world, but the inner state will gradually brighten as it starts to reflect the brighter future.