A treacherous part of the river

Aug 2010, Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm

I painted this in August 2010 and it is actually a bit darker than the picture suggests. This was a month before the company I worked for went bankrupt and I was left unemployed. I think our path is written and re-written as a continuous consequence of our actions and somehow I was aware of what was to come. As I think everyone is. Starting to re-write ones future may not yield changes for many years as our past actions still reverberate in the world, but the inner state will gradually brighten as it starts to reflect the brighter future.

Two worlds confused

Have you ever noticed that people have two worlds confused? The one where everything is perfect. People behave with integrity and in a self less manner. Everybody works not for money, but to fulfill the purpose of the position without error. This world is applied on the judgement of our social interactions. The bank teller who has an attitude, the boss, who is greedy and unscrupulous, etc. Then there is the other world. One, where we are only human, one, where mistakes are allowed, one, where it is only 'natural' to take advantage if someone else is "stupid" enough to fall for it, one, where rudeness and even violence is justified by the anger inside, one, where only survival counts. That is the world that we tend to allow for ourselves. It is always amazing to me to experience the level of hypocrisy people can live with, without noticing the slightest discrepancy in their actions and words themselves. My suggestion is, consciously make an effort to decide on the world you want to live by, make it the foundation of your every action and resist habitual hypocrisy - impeccable behaviour is the only thing we can consciously do to grow in consciousness.

31 December 2010, Gouache on MDF, 2 panels 600x450mm

Peace of Mind

Mar 2011, Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm

Letting the world pass by - disconnecting from the world for a while is a wonderful experience for the spirit. It is hard earned to be left alone and retain a level of sanity. Without our social network, the conventions of right and wrong break down and the moral compass can spin out of control. What would you do if you nobody else was around? What would be the point of existence? But if you have faced nothing you find that all action is equal, all effort is in vain, nothing goes unnoticed and nothing lasts. Once I stopped agitating through being conscious in every moment and swallowing the ego, I eventually found things getting smoother and getting a little respite.

Joys of Life

Finding a piece of happyness...

Jul 2010, Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm

Dec 2010, Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm

Compassion

How is it that other's can be 'better' than I am? I wonder if you also ask yourself that question sometime! I just read a tweet from Dalai Lama: "When you have moistened your mind with love, you can begin to meditate on compassion"
My first thought was something like "What a lot of dribble", "moisten your mind with love - what an odd expression". Then I found myself thinking of a smart reply I could counter that with and suddenly I felt what he was talking about and realized I am not quite there yet. Is he there or is it something he just learned from a book? But then he doesn't have to worry about living. He's always been treated like a kinggod on earth, from birth, no struggle, no need to face the insecurity in this reality where people are ready to shoot you or sacrifice you in other ways for their own perceived benefit without a second thought.
Whereas you and me, we struggle to live up to the expectations of those around us, we can't depend on anybody, nobody is there when we fall. Your best 'mates' soon disappear should something happen to you. And life is a deadly disease! We will all die, including Dalai Lama. At least our bodies will and the existence of an immortal soul is subject to belief. But to meditate on compassion leaves the mind in such beautiful tranquility, a great joy of life tempered by the sadness of existence. Thank you Dalai Lama for this gem of wisdom - where ever it may have arisen it speaks of a greater mind.
So I name this painting Compassion,

Oct 2010, Gouache on MDF, 600x900mm

Coming Together

 Every person, I think, has their own duality, their Jekyll and Hide, their female and male aspect. Both aspects write our life in the image of their conflict. The constant energy of the pull from one side to the other, maintaining the pretend singularity that is expected by our friends and family, drains us and compels us.
After allowing the surpessed side to emerge from the darkness and nurturing it along, after ending all connections that bound me to conformity, after enduring the turmoil created and with well tested patience, the two paths of duality converge in "Coming Together" with light beginning to penetrate into all of life from the primal energies that are released from fighting itself.

"Coming Together" - Jan 2011. Gouache on MDF. Size 900x600mm

 

Happy for you to download the jpg and use it however you wish, but please acknowledge the source. I have also decided that I will sell some of my work IF there is someone who appreciates it as I can't hang them all on my walls. If you don't like it, or don't get it, please do not leave a negative comment.

More soon...

What is my Art?

I have been painting for the last 20 years for god knows what reason. I just feel compelled at times to throw colour together and see what appears. It can take months before I can start another work before being ready to invest a large amount of energy into a completely futile activity. Not many people have seen my work but I have been encouraged to put it out there. Please don't ask "What is it?" - It is NOTHING! I couldn't paint a thing if I wanted to as I have no visual memory. When I close my eyes, there is no image in my head. That is why it is formless art. I put colour down and wait for whatever materialises, which reflects my feelings at that point in life. While there is no plan, it usually takes 2 or 3 sessions to complete a piece of work. The first session results in the problem. A unsatisfactory state, where there is something present that has beauty in my eyes, but lots missing or usually bits I am very unhappy with. The second session is the struggle to take the piece to a new direction and the third is the rounding off and adding some detail.

What I value in my work is the formlessness that is always fresh. I can look at the pieces and never see the same. Nothing is perfect, nothing is the same. There is continuous variation everywhere and if I let my eyes and mind wander, sections of the work come to live through my mind trying to make sense. Whole scenes arise when meditating in this way.

My hope is that you might also see something of Beauty in the NOTHING I've created as that is where Beauty lies. All is nothing in the end and the conceptual boxes we apply through our conditioned minds strain a world of magnificent infinity into utilitarian abstractions devoid of beauty. For me, the representation of nothing, defeating the mind in conceptualising to simplicity, is a means to appreciate infinity.


So I'll start backwards with my latest creation
"Lunar Eclipse" June 2011.  Gouache and Acrylics on MDF. Size 600x900mm

You may see an eye, but maybe allow your mind to wander bit thinking of our grasping perception consuming the world around us with a reflection of everything at the source that goes unnoticed and a new start, a fresh beginning to re-write the future. Happy for you to download the jpg and use it however you wish, but please acknowledge the source. I have also decided that I will sell some of my work IF there is someone who appreciates it as I can't hang them all on my walls. If you don't like it, or don't get it, please do not leave a negative comment.
More soon...